He’s still-always-faithful

God gave me a swift kick in the pants this morning.  Don’t you just love it when that happens.

I’ve been feeling far from God the past little while. Life is busy, and there’s always an excuse for not getting together with Him.

This morning Ray had already left for work, I was wide awake at 5:45, thanks to his cell phone vibrating on the table, ( on a Saturday morning!!!)  the kids were still asleep, and I thought that I would like to lie in bed and read for a while. So I got up to find a book, and walked past my Bible on the table. And heard a very clear voice in my head telling me to pick it up, open it up and READ it.

So I did what I always do when I’m out of a Bible reading habit. I opened it up, and just read random verses here and there. I was reading Psalms, and was cross-referencing a verse in Hebrews. And started reading in Hebrews. Chapter 4.

I’ve been especially tired lately. Except never in the evening when I should be. So I stay up late because I can’t sleep, but then am like a zombie later in the day. Until evening comes, when I’m wide awake again. Only to start the process all over again.

So when my eye caught a verse about rest, you know that I was all over it. 😉

Hebrews 4: 9-11 “There remaineth therefore a rest to the people of God. For he that is entered into his rest, he also hath ceased from his own works, as God did from his. Let us labour therefore to enter into that rest, lest any man fall after the same example of disbelief.”

God did His work,and then He rested when it was finished. In verse 10, it is talking about Jesus entering Heaven when He finished His work. And in verse 11, we are told that we will enter that same rest–after we finish our work. Which is that no man fall under disbelief. So often I tell God that no, I’m too tired to do that too. Lord, I already do this, this, this and this for You. And those last two, Lord, they require alot of work, and keep me really busy, so You can’t really mean that You want me to do something else. 

My job here on earth is to tell others about Him.  And if I’m tired because of it, I know that I will have rest someday.  But  if I’m exhausted because I’m too busy doing other things,  then it’s time to smarten up and do what I’m supposed to be doing.

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It’s been a rough week around here.  While I don’t want to share any details, please pray for my family, as my Grandmother passed away yesterday.   We’ve expected for a few days that it was coming, but it was still very sudden. 

I’ll be back to the blog in a few days.  Which reminds me that I haven’t introduced you to the newest member of our family yet.  You’ll be able to meet her in a few days.  I know, you just can’t wait.  And yes,  I am crazy.

Child-Eyes

I was driving last week and I went down a road that I usually don’t go on anymore. And I saw a house that I spent a lot of time at as a child. The parents were friends with my parents and their 3 kids were the same ages as the three of us. Man, do I ever have some memories of that place.  And driving by, they all came flying right back at me. And I spent the rest of my drive re-living some major memories from my childhood. Fun!!  Lasagna for lunch after church, building boats in the basement,  playing baseball, hiding out in the treehouse.  Sunny afternoons in the sun porch, Planting  acorns in the driveway.  Making plans to be a missionary with my best friend, marrying him, and living on a houseboat.   The night that they moved away.

But I was also amazed by something as I viewed this house again. I couldn’t believe how small it was. When I was a kid, that house was huge!  HUGE!!  Or so it seemed to my child-eyes.  Main floor, upstairs, and a basement!  A dining room, and a sun porch. It seemed so big to me then. But now, I realized that it really wasn’t that huge house that I remembered.  Just a small little 2-storey home.  Funny how things seem different when we see them through child-eyes, isn’t it?

And then I got to thinking.  Do I still view God with my child-eyes?  With eyes so full of wonder, so amazed at His hugeness?  Even though I’m now a grown-up, is God still as big to me now as we was back when I was first getting to know Him?

I pray that I will never forget the hugeness of God.  Never stop being amazed by the wonders of Him.  Never not be quietly in awe of His Holiness.

Isaiah 6:3 ” Holy, Holy, Holy is the LORD of hosts: the whole earth is full of His glory.”

Why I’m glad…….

So God really used my time without a computer to teach me, and to draw me closer to Him. I’m ashamed that I was spending so much time in front of the computer that He had to take it away from me to get my attention. But He certainly got it.

One thing that God has been teaching me is about my prayer life. I talk with God all through the day, but one night I realized that all I’m doing is talking at God, and I wasn’t taking the time for Him to talk to me.  My prayers were all bullet point prayers. Short, to the point, and usually because there was a need. “God, please let the traffic be decent on the highway, cause I’m already late  for this appointment”, or “God, please make T. stop coughing tonight, so that we  can all get some rest”.   And at the end of the day, I would think I should pray, but I’ve been talking to God all day, so I’m okay.

Not so, my friends, not so at all.

Communication with God is just like any other communication. It takes two.  It drives me crazy when I’m trying to talk to someone, and they’re always interrupting, bringing the conversation to them. Not that I need it to be about me, but it does need to be a two-way street.  Well, that’s what I was doing with God.

And then I would wonder why life was going crazy!

I’ve started a prayer notebook,  and I’m reading through the  Bible looking for verses on prayer.  Whenever I find one, I write it out in my (cute!)  little notebook.  Then at the end of the chapter, I go back and also write down what each verse is telling me about prayer.  

I’m starting with some of the shorter NT books,  so I don’t get over-whelmed,  and then quit.  Cause trust me, I know myself very well,  and that is exactly what would happen.   Thre other wonderful benefit to this of course, is that I’m into the Word, another thing that I sometimes struggle to find the time for.

I’ve also started a prayer journal.  Again, it’s a cute little chipboard album,  with binder rings, so I can put more pages in as needed.   I have to admit that often when people say  can you pray for so and so,  or can you remember this in your prayers, I always say of course I will, and then often I forget.  Which is why I need to write things down. 

And by writing this down here, I’m also making myself accountable to you, my three faithful readers.

Being in communion with God is the sweetest joy!  I can’t imagine living life without it.  And for that reason I’m  thankful that I lost my computer for a while.

His Strength, not mine

I was feeling restless yesterday, and was flipping through my Bible.  This is the passage that I came to and stopped to really read, and think about.  I’m often guilty of just reading over verses, but not really stopping to think about what I read.  But still patting myself on the back after, because after all, I just read my Bible.  The older I get and the more I strive to serve and love my God fully, the more I know that it’s in the studying and pondering that I really get the benefits. 

Psalm 29

1. Give unto the LORD, O ye mighty, give unto the LORD glory and strength.

2. Give unto the Lord the glory due unto His name; worship the LORD in the beauty of holiness.

3. The voice of the LORD is upon the waters: the God of glory thundereth: the LORD is upon many waters.

4. The voice of the LORD is powerful; the voice of the LORD is full of majesty.

5. The voice of the LORD breaketh the cedars; yea,  the LORD breaketh the cedars of Lebanon.

6. He makeththem also to skip like a calf; Lebanon and Sirion like a young unicorn.

7. The voice of the LORD divideth the flames of fire.

8. The voice of the LORD shaketh the wilderness; the LORD shaketh the wilderness of Kadesh.

9. The voice of the LORD makeththe hinds to calve, and discovereth the forests: and in his temple doth every one speak of his glory.

10. The LORD sittethupon the flood; yea, the LORD sitteth King forever.

11. The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace.

I love this passage.  It’s one of my new favorites.  It starts with my role.  Give to the LORD.  Give to Him glory and strength.  Worship Him.  Worship Him in the beauty of His holiness.   The beauty of His holiness.  I love this.  How often I skip over that.  God is holy, yup I know, been hearing it since I was born.  But to stop and think on His holiness.  The beauty of His holiness.  Perfection.  It baffles my mind, and makes me cringe in my imperfection.  To stop and think on how holy God is makes me also stop and think on how un-holy I am.

The next few verses describe God’s majesty, His strength.  What His voice alone can do!  Powerful, full of majesty, breaks the cedars, divides flames, shakes the wilderness!  Wow!

The last verse is my favorite.  It’s a promise.  “The LORD will give strength unto His people;  the LORD will bless His people with peace.”

And we just saw His strength described in the previous verses.  We know what He can do!

I don’t know where you are in your life right now.  But I do know where I am, and I know that I have not been relying on the Lord’s strength.  I’ve been trying to do things myself.  Trying to find my own solutions to  things that have been springing up like dandelions here lately. 

Relying on His strength, being blessed with His peace.  How could I choose any other way?

I pray that you, too, will know His strength and peace today.

It’s our day!

On this day in 1996, Ray and I joined our hearts and our lives together, and today we celebrate our 11th anniversary!

We were young (I was 20, he was 21), we had only dated for a few months, although we’d known each other for 5 years, we had very little money and we were told that it would last at the most, 3 years. We had our love for each other, we had both of our parents marriages as examples, and most importantly, we had our Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ with us. We knew that this was what we supposed to be doing.

Well, we proved those nay-sayers wrong, as we knew we would. And it’s been 11 years of many changes– different homes, 3 kids, different jobs, but through it all our love for each other has not wavered.

So Happy Anniversary my Dear Husband. I’m the luckiest lady alive–I’m married to my best friend, who also happens to be the most wonderful father to his kids, a man of God, a cutie, a big teddy bear, a terrific snuggler, a wonderful provider, a devoted family man. All that, and he’s funny, too! And he loves ME–imagine that!

Trying to get it right again

When Ray and I first got married many years ago, we were very faithful at attending church twice every Sunday.  And we were committed to raising our “someday family” in the same way.  If there was church on Sunday, the Wade’s were going to be there.

And then the kids came along, and we did well at our committment.  We were there.  It wasn’t always easy to fit a baby’s schedule into going to church and when that baby became a rowdy toddler, it only got harder. But we knew where we were supposed to be. And we were there.  Along came #2.  And it got harder. Especially when that little one had asthma, and we tried to avoid colds, as this seemed to set off his asthma symptoms the most.   And somewhere along the way, we got out of the practice of attending both services on Sundays.  Faithful in the mornings, not at all in the evenings.

Then, when we would try, our rowdy little boys were not used to sitting in church and I would leave so frustrated and overwhelmed at how difficult it was, that it would be ages before we would try again.  If only we had stayed where we should have been all along.  Then those little boys would know how to behave. 

 And staying home on Sunday nights?  It was awful.  I was so conviceted, and knew where I was supposed to be, and was miserable on Sunday nights.  Living where we do, and seeing quite a few cars on their way to the evening service didn’t help either.  Except that really, it did.  It all helped to convict me, and remind me of where I was supposed to be.

Well, it’s been a number of years of miserable Sunday evenings, and attending evening service sporadicaly (I know–that’s spelled wrong–it’s driving me crazy and I can’t figure it out!)  Very seldom would be the proper term, I think.  We’re trying again, and this time, making it work.  One of my favorite excuses (and believe me, I had a lot)  was that it would take me too long to get the kids stuff together and then we would be late.  Solved that problem.  I went to Dollarama and picked up drawing pads and coloring books for all three kids, along with pencils, crayons, erasers, and colored pencils.  And a tote bag.  Everything stays in the bag, the things only get used at church and there is no longer a scurry of activity of everyone trying to find what they need.  One problem solved.  But my main tool in making sure that we actually get there on Sunday nights?  Prayer.  Lots of it. 

And I can’t even begin to say how much smoother Sunday evenings go now.  My kids aren’t perfect and if you happen to be sitting behind us, or in front of us, you’ll defintely hear a fair bit of rustling and disturbance in our row.  We’re working on that.  And they’re getting better. The important thing is that we’re where we’re supposed to be on Sunday evenings, and my prayer is that we stay faithful this time.

Reminders from a rose….

See the pretty rose at the top of my blog now?  That’s my rose–I grew it myself!  Ray bought me a little rose bush a few summers ago, and I planted it in front of the house and nurtured it all summer, and was amazed when it bloomed–I’m terrible with plants.  I so loved that beautiful rose, it was gorgeous.  There were some more buds, too but I think the dog must have gotten them.  That was the only rose I had all year.  And then fall came, and winter and I kind of forgot (okay, never got around to)  getting it ready for winter and that was the end of my rose bush.  Oh, I loved it though.  Today, even though it’s cool out, feels so springy, and yesterday even more so.  Sounds like it’s going to be warm for the next few days.  So my rose is at the top of my blog to remind me that spring really is coming and with it gardens to get ready. Last spring I was recovering from surgery and couldn’t do anything with my garden (thank goodness for perenials, though, at least there was something there!)  Oh, but this year….I can’t wait for that first trip down the road to Brooklyn Farms to pick out my flowers!  I plan to do a herb garden this year, too, for the first time.  Can spring get here fast enough?

 But as much as the picture of my rose reminds me that spring is coming, I have it there as another reminder as well.  As I press on in this life toward the ultimate goal, my rose reminds me that my relationship with my Lord is like that rose bush.  It needs nurturing, it needs care, or it will shrivel up and die.  Just like that rose bush needed water and fertilizer to grow, I need the meat from the Word, and a consistant prayer life to grow. And when the cold weather came, and the rose bush had been neglected, it didn’t make it. Right now, when all is smooth sailing in my life, and somedays I think that I’m doing okay on my own, I still need to be nurturing my relationship so that it will survive and still flourish even when the hard times come.

I’m so thankful for a God who remains faithful and constant even when I’m not.